How to Find (and Keep) the Right Mentor
Oct 20, 2025
You can read every book, watch every tutorial, and still miss one of the most powerful tools for growth: a mentor — someone who’s already been where you’re trying to go.
A mentor doesn’t just give answers.
They give perspective, feedback, and momentum.
But how do you find the right one — and how do you make sure the relationship actually lasts?
Start With Who You Want to Become
Don’t chase titles — chase alignment.
Ask yourself:
- Who models the kind of life, leadership, or integrity I respect?
- Who’s two or three steps ahead of me — not fifty?
- Who consistently demonstrates what I’m trying to develop?
You’re not looking for a celebrity.
You’re looking for someone accessible who has experience and credibility — even if they never call themselves a “mentor.”
Mentors Are Not Assigned — They’re Pursued
Most mentor relationships begin informally:
- A question after a meeting
- A coffee chat that turns into a monthly rhythm
- A leader who takes notice when you ask thoughtful questions
If you’re waiting for someone to offer to mentor you, you might be waiting forever.
Initiate. Follow up. Express curiosity.
Mentorship is a mutual connection — not a formal program.
Don’t Just Receive — Steward the Relationship
Here’s where people mess up: they get a mentor and immediately make it all about themselves.
A healthy mentorship thrives on:
- Showing up prepared
- Asking intentional questions
- Acting on advice (and reporting back)
- Respecting time and boundaries
You don’t have to impress your mentor — but you do need to show that you’re coachable.
Mentors invest in what multiplies. If they see you move when they speak, they’ll keep pouring in.
When It’s Time to Move On
Some mentors are lifelong. Others are seasonal. And that’s okay.
Growth sometimes shifts your needs, industries, or rhythms. If the relationship fades, don’t force it — honor it:
- Express gratitude
- Stay in touch
- Be the kind of person they’d mentor again
And then? Pass it on. You’ll be a mentor before you know it.
Final Thought: Mentors Don’t Find You — You Become Findable
Be curious. Be teachable. Be consistent.
The right mentor is drawn not to potential alone — but to those who are already doing the work, hungry to grow, and humble enough to learn.
So start learning out loud — and let the right people find you in motion.